Our Cracker Panel seeks grumpy people
BY STYLE EDITOR, ON 20 NOV 2009 09:16 HOME & GARDENCOMMENTS
We’ve launched a search to find three of the grumpiest people in Britain for our new Cracker Panel.
For the first time, being dull, grouchy and humourless will be a positive asset for a job application with the successful candidates being asked to judge the quality of jokes used in our Christmas crackers. Only jokes which are so good they make even the Victor Meldrews of Britain laugh will make it through to the final list.
If we’re still awake by the time we’ve finished reading your CV, then, clearly, you’re the wrong person for the job. Candidates can nominate themselves but we’d prefer applications to come from close family, friends or colleagues, who may be in a better position to support their claim.
Posts will be part time, and payment will be performance related. Any bonus will be payable in Debenhams products.
Want to apply?
We’ll need five brief but powerful reasons why each candidate is up to the challenge. Email your application to firstname.lastname@example.org by 30 November.
Check out our current Christmas crackers
Here are some of the worst Christmas Cracker Jokes…
Q. Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A. A mince spy.
Q. What’s the fastest thing in water?
A. A motor pike.
Q. Why do birds fly south in winter?
A. Because it’s too far to walk.
Have you heard a worse cracker joke than these? Leave it in a comment below.